Sunday, January 31, 2016

New item is putting a bustle in my step

I love working on new things, and when I came across these I just had to make one... or a dozen.

These simple bustles are so much fun to make, and I can't wait to wear them!

Besides these fun Star Wars and Doctor Who themes, I'm working on some holidays and more formal looking bustles.

Follow what's new on my Facebook page, or on Etsy or the Online Market.

Friday, January 15, 2016

Something you may not know about me

I have quite a few social phobias. Anything that involves talking on the phone to a stranger takes me up to a week to get the nerve up to do. I don't like going out unless I know at least one person that I can use as an anchor all night. I'm also rather shy, and big groups take a lot out of me.

This shocks quite a few people who have seen me "work a crowd". The truth is, I don't work the crowd, The Sewing Wench does. It doesn't take much to get me into that persona, but every event that I work where I'm selling my stuff, it's The Sewing Wench you interact with.

It really isn't that shocking when you consider that I'm the first internet generation. We learned that we could be social with out having to show our true selves. We didn't need to face the rejection because while we did have winners, we also had participation ribbons. If you participated, you weren't a looser. You weren't a winner, but you're not a looser either.

The truth is, becoming The Sewing Wench is kind of like staying behind that computer screen. They don't have to see ME, and it's her they reject, not me. This is why I always support cos-play. My generation and the ones after me haven't grown up in the social worlds as the ones before. Hell even dating is digital and you no longer have to face the person who might reject you, you just send an email and if they don't respond, you can tell yourself all kinds of things. It's kind of like that participation ribbon. If they don't tell you "no" then you participated so no losers here.

I think that's what most of my social anxiety and phobias come from. That fear of rejection. I didn't have to practice it as a youngster. I was never forced to put myself out there. It also wouldn't surprise me if that's what a lot of the kids my age say their social anxiety stems from too. No one likes to be rejected, but in generations past you had to face it, so the sting was a bit less. Kind of like building up a tolerance for something. If you experience it enough, the effect dull out.

There are occasions now where I can't hide behind my alter ego. And what I can't wiggle out of I have to face. It takes me a while to do this. I prep and practice what I need to say, and write out a script, but eventually it gets done. And I'm the better for it.

So don't scoff at that person who always wears Wonder Woman socks, or the guy who wears the Micheal Jackson jacket everywhere. You never know what villains they are fighting in their life.

Sunday, January 3, 2016

Ending the year with a Bang...Literally

On Dec. 5th 2015 I was on my way home from vending at the Cin City Burlesque show when the back end of my van was smashed into by another car.

Because it was an older van, the damage was more than the value, so insurance called it a total loss. Oh yeah, the driver of the other car fled the scene because they did not have a valid license or insurance. There is still some debate on whether it was the drunk fella or the girl driving, but the girl is the one being charged. 

This accident really took a lot out of me. I realized just how fragile my confidence can be. This hasn't been an easy case to handle, it's been a fight at every turn.  For the first two weeks I posted a daily update on my gofundme page ( Not only was this a way for me to ask (plead) for help, but it was also a bit therapeutic. It gave me a chance to voice to the world every step forward and every hurdle that I had to leap as it came. 

But the other thing that this experience taught me is that I am my biggest obstacle. I would get so into my own head, so into everything that was going wrong, that I couldn't work myself up and stopped doing the things that made me happy. 

I could have been working on more costumes, after the injuries were pretty much on the mend. I could have put a lot more effort into getting things on ebay and such. But I didn't. I stood in my own way a good portion of the time. 

I have let myself get in my own way a few times. I've been scared that something was too big for me, so I didn't go after it. But realizing that you're hurting yourself, is a great start. Now it's time to do something about it. 

No excuses. No "poor me" attitude. I have stuff that needs to be done so by golly it will get done. No one is going to drop a corset company in my lap. I have to make it happen. 

Last year was a great start to making this come true. The year ended very rough, but I survived, and now that I am in January (and have my school reimbursement check because I still don't have the insurance money) I can but my effort into striving, not just surviving. 

I may have lost my way in December. I may have let doubt cloud my path. But today is a new day, new month, new year and a new chance to make things happen.